The Legend of Slottsfjellet: Chapter Five (Part 16)

Just starting? Be sure to check out The Legend of Slottsfjellet: Foreword and Disclaimer first, so you know what’s going on.

Joe was not surprised to find Karl back at the trailer. “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting, Karl.”

“Not at all, Mr. Stadtler. I have been here only a couple of minutes.” He smiled warmly, either missing or ignoring Joe’s sarcasm. Joe did not return the smile. “I’d like to discuss a few things about the construction, which should, by the way, begin no later than Thursday. Since today is Monday, that gives you three days.”

“Go ahead.”

“First, how is your progress with the drawings?”

“Fine. They’re on the table, if you want to look at them.”

Karl sat at the desk and leafed through the vellum. “I’m not an architect, Mr. Stadtler, but I do have some experience in the field. Your skills have been accurately praised; this is excellent work.” Joe offered no response. Karl turned back to Joe and continued. “In order to start in three days, we must have labourers here Wednesday—that’s the day after tomorrow. This means that your final draft of the plans must be complete by tomorrow morning. At that time, I will have additional details of your assignment to share with you.”

Karl rose from the stool and smiled. “That is all I had to discuss, Mr. Stadtler. Is there anything else you need right now?”

Joe thought for a few seconds. “No, not really. . . Wait, there is something. I assume I’ll need to make prints of the plans when I’m done with them. Do you have a printer or a copier for me to use? And some extra paper? I didn’t see any in here.”

“We can have it all here tomorrow morning,” said Karl.

“That’s it, then,” said Joe. Karl nodded and left.

After Karl went out of the trailer, Joe sat down at the table to work. He continued the rest of the morning, and didn’t stop when Marta brought lunch. He drew rapidly, and by four o’clock he was completely finished with all the plans. As he stacked them in order, he was surprised to find himself with nothing to do.

7 comments on “The Legend of Slottsfjellet: Chapter Five (Part 16)

  1. 1. “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting, Karl” is missing a period.

    2. Did you use this spelling of “labourers” because Karl is European? I think it works great.

    3. I also love that you included the “ender” graphic!

    4. I felt like there was something stylistically different in the recent sections, so I read back over the first few parts of the story, and found what it was: Joe talked to himself (thinking in italics). While it definitely can be overdone, I think there are a few places in the recent sections where it might help, both to continue the flow of the story, and to give the reader continued insights into what Joe is thinking.

    5. Questions: Any idea how long this will end up? Do you have a plot mapped out, or are you working it out as you go? Either way, I look forward to reading more! Boris rocks!

    • 1. Fixed, thanks.

      2. Not only because he is European, but because he studied at Cambridge when he was a young college student. Thanks for noticing! You’ll also notice that Karl uses contractions more than some of the other Norwegian characters, implying a higher fluency.

      3. Every other break between parts has occurred where that graphic appears in the text I’m retyping. I couldn’t justify a separate post for such a short paragraph here, so I got to use the ender. Maybe I should go back and put it at the end of all the other posts, too!

      4. I have a lot of reworking to do on this passage. I’ll take your comments into consideration, because for now it just doesn’t work the way it is.

      5. I had the whole novel mapped out day-by-day. Unfortunately, that’s one of the things I lost when I moved out of my parents house, along with half a chapter of text past what I have available to retype.

      As for target length: I don’t know. The first version was a couple of pages and intended to be a short story. In my opinion, it still reads like a short story (and I’ve had at least one other person say the same thing), even though by the time I got to Chapter 4, I realized I wanted to turn this into a novel. So, I either need to speed things up to finish the short story, or go back and work on the pacing of the first three chapters to better set this up as a novel.

  2. This is actually my least favorite of all the sections I’ve posted so far. I needed to move things forward, get the drafting done, and set things up for workers to arrive… But this doesn’t really work for me.

  3. I like how Marta doesn’t use contractions. I didn’t notice Karl using them, but did catch that she doesn’t. I like it because it reminds me that she would be speaking with an accent.

  4. There should be a “like” button on our keyboards. I just remembered that the name Marta makes me think of the “Sound of Music.” And reading your earlier post, I like coming up with names. It’s fun to research the names of different cultures.

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